Counting my blessings...

and a sermon for Sunday...

this is a long post...

I pray that,

 if you bear with me,

that it will be worth it--

for you-or someone you know

who might need to hear it...

First and foremost,

THANK YOU SHELLY---

for your comment

and sending me to the missing card!!!

It's on Lisa Stenz' blog

and can be found here...

I just thought they are so pretty--

simple and clean

even if doesn't have any pop dots!!!

So that was a very nice

unexpected blessing

to start my day off!

On another note---

but even along the same lines...

I gotta say that

Yes, people,

miracles do still happen

and God still answers prayers!

So--

ENJOY THE RIDE...

Many moons ago...

I lost my first husband

to lung cancer and emphysema.

Shortly after that,

during a visit with my pastor,

something he said

popped the top of a HUGE can of worms...

and memories of having been sexually abused as a child

came spewing out.

The next 7 months

were a real rollercoaster for me.

There were flashbacks, body memories, nightmares.

I was scared to death.

I had absolutely no clue

who to turn to--

so I did what I normally do--

after I've tried to fix it myself--

usually unsuccessfully--

and I asked God.

And he sent me back to my pastor

who told me

 he had no prior experience

with dealing with this sort of thing

and, given the issue, maybe I needed another woman to work with.

I was insistent that God had told me to take it to him

and he said

he was willing to do what he could.

I distinctly remember

the day I purchased not one but two copies of

The Courage to Heal.

The book seemed HUGE.

I handed my pastor his copy and,

with lots of fear and tears, said,

"My God--I am really sick!"

He said it was ok...

we would deal with it.

And we did.

In seven -what now seems short

but at the time  seemed like an eternity--months

I delt with what most women whose stories I read

took years upon years to deal with.

It was fast, furious and, yes--

even FABULOUS

to see how God was bringing healing

into my life.

I had an awesome support system.

I learned of a couple other women close to me

that had gone through the same thing.

At the time

I couldn't figure out

why things had broken lose when they did.

WHY THEN?

I should be dealing with the loss of my husband...

but yet

here I was dealing with a very different loss...

but a loss and death--nonetheless...

Why hadn't a counselor picked up on it years ago...

why hadn't it completely surfaced

when I had inklings of something like this having happened

when I first met my husband?

Why not...why not...

why...

Today

I firmly believe....it just hadn't been time earlier.

"IN GOD'S TIME"

is a cliche we often hear--

and yet

 IN HIS PERFECT TIME,

when what needed to be in place was---

when HE KNEW

(key words here people...when HE KNEW...)

I was ready...

when the angels around me were ready...

He let the process begin.

And not a second sooner

Fast forward

12 years....

I've been struggling and battling with some major issues...

I finally got worn down and out enough

mentally, physically and emotionally--

I had complained, whined, ranted and raged

and had exhausted my entire bag of tricks

that I did what I do best-

I finally took control

(insert belly laugh--I have control issues-

I am a true red-head!)

and  I made a phone call...

and, as a result of the many, many prayers

of those around me---

as a result of that call...

which led to a one hour visit...

during which

ONE QUESTION

was asked...

that once again

popped the top off yet another can of worms

I never had an inkling

was even on the shelf in my cupboard.

It was totally, totally unexpected...

and at the same time the cannoball hit my stomach

I also felt the ton of weight that had been sitting on my shoulders

for months years

lift.

Is it going to be a quick easy-fix?

No way!

Is it going to happen overnight?

Na-uh.

Is it going to be painless?

Probably not.

Do I know what the picture will look like

after all the pieces are in place?

I have...no clue.

But---

I DO KNOW--

that as long as I let

God take control---and lead the way...

that the healing that will happen

during my journey will be well worth

the pain, the tears, the struggle, the HARD work--

and the HEART WORK

I have to do.

On me.

And me alone.

So

for those of you that,

after reading something I've posted

uttered a prayer--offered a good thought

that paved the way to this path...

I thank you.

To any of you who choose to do so now

on my behalf,

I thank you.

And, last but not least,

to any of you out there who are struggling

who don't know what to do or who to turn to...

know that

YOU ARE NOT ALONE.

If you will but simply ask--

GOD WILL ANSWER...

in His time.

Don't give up.

Keep asking.

And when you get discouraged-

because the answer doesn't come within seconds-

minutes...a day...a week or longer...

don't give up.

Remember He's preparing the way---

He's preparing the people around you...

He's making the necessary travel plans

just for you.

When it begins

just fasten your seat belt

and enjoy the ride!

Peace.

Until next time

happy stamping and scrapping.

Blessings,